Despite the Changes, Love Remains the Same

Many days I wake up with a thought and I tend to dwell on it for a bit. I analyze the thought, I flip it upside down and run it over and over inside my brain. I’ll get tired of the thought for 30 seconds and then I’ll begin thinking about it all over it. I can be obsessive at times..and analytical…critical even, if you will. This week, at least for the first two days of it, I’ve been thinking about the same thought. It’s something that I heard in a song late Sunday evening and it’s been on my mind since.

The lyric from the song I heard said something along the lines of the following, “Everything in life has changed, but love remains the same.” The statement was simple. And some days, I would have heard the lyric and thought nothing more of it. But for some reason….this week, it stuck with me. I am amazed by love. And I am in awe of the different types of love. Every love that exists between the couples I photograph is different just as each couple is unique. Their love is special; but what I’ve come to decide, the most special love is that which lasts.

A friend of mine once told me, “The moment you stop loving someone, is the moment you realize you never loved them in the first place.”

I was seated next to an older woman at last weekend’s Silent Retreat. For the first three days of the retreat, we sat and ate in silence and prayer. On the last day at lunch we were allowed to speak, and to hear each others’ stories. The lady beside me that I hadn’t known for the past three days revealed the most beautiful stories about her life, her family, and her love. Her husband, recently deceased had been married to her for 50 years. WOW. On the year of their 50th anniversary (4 yrs ago), he passed. I asked her if she thought love changed over those 50 years and this is what she told me:

In life, there are so many things that change. You change, your priorities change, your body changes, and even your opinions change. You have children and over time, you grow apart and come back together. But what matters is, the love. Throughout our entire lives we always loved each

other. We didn’t always like each other but our love kept us together. 🙂 And when we liked each other again, the love continued to grow.

I admired her. I admired her honesty, her wisdom, and her love for her husband. You could see in her eyes and feel the energy in the room when she talked about him. 50 years. MAN. That’s twice my age that she’s spent with the same person. When I think of how much I’ve changed in the past 25 years, I know my parents are going STRAIGHT to heaven for their unconditional love for me and for my brothers. And one day, I hope to look back on my own life and say that I’ve spent 50 years loving and growing with the same person.

Shooting weddings is an incredible occupation. I witness love and I document love. And now that I’ve been doing it for a few years, it’s truly amazing to see the couples’ who’s weddings have come and gone…along with a few anniversaries, now starting their journey toward their own 50 years. They are beginning to have children, some are moving to new places.

I think it’d be safe to say that ALL of them are experiencing the changes of life, yet their love still remains.

This photo was taken of two of my best friends this year on their wedding day. For the past 5 years, their lives have changed dramatically. They’ve gone through architecture school and finished their masters degrees. They’ve traveled to Washington D.C. for the Solar Decathlon, moved twice, and are now working for firms in a different city. I am so proud of their accomplishments and excited for their love. They came to stay with me this past weekend, and I was happy to see that despite the changes in their lives, their love….it’s the same.